Freedom

[this is not a note about determinism]

'Cause it's a bittersweet symphony this life

Trying to make ends meet, you're a slave to the money then you die

I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down

You know the one that takes you to the places where all the veins meet, yeah

No change, I can't change, I can't change, I can't change,

but I'm here in my mold , I am here in my mold

But I'm a million different people from one day to the next

I can't change my mold, no, no, no, no, no

- The Verve - Bitter Sweet Symphony

Only 600 miles to the south, there's a vast city. And here you find civilized man. Civilized man refused to adapt himself to his environment; instead, he adapted his environment to suit him. So he built cities, roads, vehicles, machinery, and he put up power lines to run his labor-saving devices. But somehow he didn't know where to stop. The more he improved his surroundings to make life easier, the more complicated he made it. So now his children are sentenced to 10-15 years of school, just to learn how to survive in this complex and hazardous habitat they were born into. And civilized man, who refused to adapt to his surroundings, now finds he has to adapt and re-adapt every hour of the day to his self-created environment. For instance, if it's Monday and 7:30 comes up, you have to dis-adapt from your domestic surroundings and re-adapt yourself to an entirely different environment. 8:00 means everybody has to look busy. 10:30 means you can stop looking busy for 15 minutes. And then you have to look busy again. And so your day is chopped into pieces, and in each segment of time you adapt to a new set circumstances. No wonder some people go off the rails a bit...

- The Gods Must Be Crazy

The things Man does in life: being born, spending 30 years or so preparing to live in Man’s own construct, spending another 30 years or so establishing life in that construct, and finally spending the years left remembering the past and preparing for his demise.

Faced with such a revelation, it is only appropriate if Man asks this question,

Nietzsche and the WWE

Friedrich Nietzsche

What do Friedrich Nietzsche, a famous 19th century philosopher, and the World Wrestling Entertainment have in common?

It’s the same preferred morality.

If you watch the WWE, you’ll see that it has a different standard about what’s good and bad compared to general perception. Its good guys aren’t exactly the most humble, pitiful, or sympathetic people. They are, in fact, evil and arrogant sons of a gun; literally no different than its bad guys on that matter.

So how do we tell them apart?

It’s by looking at what they’ve actually got. The good guys are the ones who have what it takes to back up their attitude. The bad guys are the cowards who don’t even stand a chance in a fair fight.

Or in other words, the WWE’s morality is about power.

Bekasi Boys

The most impossible computer generated internet ad...

Oh really?

The Search of Reason

This article took weeks to reach its current state, which is only one-third (it still has a proper ending though).
To date, one of the hardest to write, perhaps due to it being somewhat holistic.
Don't know when it'll be finished. I've got a ton of papers to write.
One thing though, this whole 'writing a more serious philosophical-ish article' thing is not bad.

The Search of Reason

Reality

Infinity times infinity.
No words suffice.

The Omen

Rain has been pouring heavily for the past few days, putting my neighborhood in a constant threat of flood.

My friends' relationships crumble to dust, leaving a trace of broken hearts.

A friend of a friend's car had a short circuit that broke into a real fire and real smoke.

A series of random unrelated contained events?

Perhaps.
Or maybe it's something else entirely.

Sometimes, the bad things around us happen as a natural and logical consequence of another bad thing,

which is exactly what happens to my world right now.

Yep,

Rick has come back to town.

Lembang 10

I took these in Lembang.
I should have taken pictures of natural landscape considering the spot, but my mood was going for objects.
I'm not a photographer (I don't think I can even be called an amateur one), that's why they're mediocre.
However, the experience made me realize how objects could be interesting.
Especially after a friend of mine bought a new camera and a very wide lens. It has a fixed aperture of 1/1.8 I think.
Blah.
This interest must wait.

A Series of Sketchshots

This is the first time I ever put a sketch of a friend's face on my blog.

The reason for it is because I was planning to make it more than just a sketch.
I wanted to create a group of stills that would display a character's vivid moments, hence make it easier for people to relate even when they didn't know who the character was.
But that was, of course, just a wishful thinking.

Rather than a group of four rectangles, I should have used a group of nine squares.
It would certainly make the job harder (even with the four rectangles, the space to draw the faces became so small that I had to sharpen my pencil over and over again just to get the little details right - and even now, I still think people who know her won't recognize her immediately), BUT it can be solved by using a bigger paper (A3).
I think it would somewhat deliver the message better.

Some other time perhaps.

A BRAND NEW Reflection on Relationships

I once wrote that a true relationship can only be reached when there is a common ground. The closer the common ground is to our hearts (beliefs, perspectives, what we love), the better it becomes.

In a way, I still believe that.

However, yesterday I found out an interesting take on a SIMILAR subject in a work.
In the work, the writer wanted to determine what really constituted a FRIENDSHIP.
He tried to do this by observing the ones around him.
From his observation, he noticed that people of different nature had good friendships. So, he concluded that differences between the persons involved were the ones that constituted a friendship.
In other words, differences make a relationship work.
Besides, differences give people a chance to complement each other, right?

However, as time went by, he found that people with more things in common also had good friendships, and even at occasions, better than some who didn’t.
This finding put the previous answer in shaky grounds.
Do differences really constitute a friendship? Or do things in common that really do the job?

He gave it another thought,
and finally he was able to reach a conclusion.

In Greater Sense

Have you experienced something like this?

• There's a well-known saying or sentence.
• Somewhere along your life, you suddenly find a much deeper meaning in that sentence, and you begin to see why it is so popular in the first place.
• You feel excited, ecstatic about this new understanding that has been revealed to you.
• You call your friend, telling him/her about it, hoping he/she will get the excitement that you get.
• But you're left disappointed, upset, and frustrated because your friend doesn't see your perspective. He/she is trapped in the popularity of the sentence, failing to see something valuable because it is heard too many times.
• So in frustration you say, "No, there's a wholly deeper meaning to it. If you see it, you'll get fired up like I do."
• "Okay," your friend says. "So tell me then."
• You open your mouth, but lo and behold, you can't find any words to explain it.
• And after a while of silence, you have no choice but saying that very same sentence again, no words added or subtracted, only with louder voice.
• And your friend replies, "Of course. I know that. It's obvious, isn't it?

Aaargh!
I hate it when it happens.

A couple of days ago, I had it TWO times in a day! One's involving a philosophical idea (not gonna touch it), and one's about Indonesia.

This is what I said.

Someone to Ignore Me

I have this female friend.
We barely see each other, and even if we did, we would just drown ourselves in consuming what's on the table in front of us or watching our surroundings.
In a way, she's not a best friend to me, and neither am I to her (I think).
However, I always consider my relationship with her as... something unique.

Why?

Because she's close enough for me to share the deeper things, but not close enough to get me hurt if she doesn't listen at all, which she most likely will.
It's not that she completely ignores me, she hears me, in fact, she listens attentively, it's only that she just doesn't take it all by heart.
Or basically, she doesn't give a shit.

I know how bad it looks, but actually, it can be helpful sometimes.
Especially in times when I feel like my head is going to explode and I'm already jaded of going through every bit of the problem over and over again.
When I decided to talk to her, occasionally, her stance would get to my perspective.
I would come to realize that the once-larger-than-universe-problem was something that didn't deserve my full throttle attention and worries.
Cool, isn't it?

Yeah well, anyway, I don't recommend doing that to your friends who desperately need you though.
You can turn up gambling for your friends' life for all you know.

**V*

You asked me if I did.








Yes Doll, I do.














I can't find better words.

Miss Indonesia Qory Sandioriva’s Interview in Miss Universe 2010

Being a woman, what piece of advice would you give to a man?

I think that when you downed the women can make you up and(s) I think that women can be said they I have advice for you that (em) if you way up you have to be nice to people (ex) (e) include women so when you downed women can be [clap] nice with you.

What is the best gift you have ever received?

The best gift somebody ever given to me is the one(d) box but (e) the character is is not a good or beautiful but it’s it it have a sounds a beautiful sounds that makes me love music.

I love music now and (um) now I’m a singer and I’m study at a singer for jazz (um) for classical and of course for pop.

That is (e) makes me know what I want to do.

That makes me know what I love it what that makes me know (um) what jobs or what kind (e) activity that I love it. [clap]

What is the worst date you have ever been on?

In one restaurant and that is the day is that I know she (eh) he is a playboy so (eh) he he have a three girlfriend like (e) include me. But before that I know that they have (e) more than one one hundred girlfriend [small laugh].

It’s very bad but I know but it’s the good is now he always care for me care not be a best friend for me and he always protect me don’t please Qory don’t like me, don’t don’t don’t same like me, you you are a nice girl, you are-

So he never touch me like a you know like a playboy but (um) he always (um) make comfortable in beside her and (um) yeah it’s very bad bad [small laugh] bad day but (um) he inspiring me to be a tough woman.

-transcribed by hub-

I'll post a note later.

UPDATE

(due to certain developments, I am obliged to add something blue to my previously planned writing)

From the above paragraphs, what do you see?

If you see a beautiful dumb girl speaking in broken English humiliating our beloved country, then I suggest you bear these things in mind:

- Qory Sandioriva is barely 19 years old. I can’t remember of achieving something special now when I am in my 27th year, let alone when I was in the same age, which I believe is also the case with A LOT of people.

- Miss Universe is the largest beauty pageant in the world. You can imagine how intensely nerve-wrecking it is, being judged from every possible angle and at every second without a break. I doubt anyone can handle that.

So if you’re going to say something pointless, baseless, and unnecessarily harsh, please think it over. It’s just drop dead idiotic and rude.

Now, let’s get on with it.

Perpetuum Jazzile!

This is a performance by Perpetuum Jazzile.
It's a Slovenian jazz and pop choir. They often do a Capella, such as in this cover of Toto's Africa.
It blew my mind away. :)

The Fasting I Believe

I believe fasting is a free chosen act of soul searching, in which you deliberately place yourself in a deprived situation, which usually revolves around meals and sex, in hope of finding new insights about pain, self-limits, willpower, or even something of a spiritual origin, whether you believe it's something God puts you to do or not.

I believe fasting is something very private and personal, of which you are truly alone, connecting with your true self and the spiritual world.

I believe fasting is a matter that resides in your heart, where the planes of physical, mental, and spiritual realms collide in a harmonious chaos that is YOU.

I believe fasting is not an act caused by fear for all punishing and wrathful God, so much that you always feel threatened and ask everyone else to help you accomplish the task by limiting themselves according to your desire.

I believe fasting is not something you can take your pride from, and in arrogance empowered by the masses, used to go rampage in violent destruction, forcing anyone into closing their businesses and bowing down to your restrictions, even when they don’t share the same faith, which is easily described by a popular-seemingly-harmless-actually-troubling-saying, ‘respect the people who are fasting’.

(this does not say that I don’t respect anyone who is in the middle of a fast, it’s just they don’t get to ask me that, let alone command it)

I believe fasting is not a matter of changing the outside world to match your inner child’s spoiled desires; a thing that is apparent in situations such as the annual increasing amount of delicious food types for sale, ironically right at the time of fast, and the rise of appeals to the local government to close all food joints during fasting hours.

in short,

I believe fasting is an act of seeing inside,

and not of judging outside.

May the fasting we all do, bring us nothing but good things.

Cyn Says

Cyn is one of my closest friends.
She is this cheerful innocent sprite of a girl and you can see no evil in her.

A couple of days ago, I called her and we talked a lot.
At one moment I explained my opinions surrounding feminism to her.
I said that women, especially in this country, had their heads imprinted with an idea that they could not become a real woman without getting married, thus making their true existence only to become a wife.
“Feminism tries to free women from this false idea,” I said. “It basically says women have the options to pursuit more dreams. They too can change the world instead of just trying to get married.”
Upon hearing this, Cyn said with her signature spritely childish voice, “I am a feminist!”
“Oh, really?” I replied. “And what kind of big goals you have other than getting married?”
“I want to finish reading Madame Wu!” (It is a book she was reading then)
“Uh-huh? What’s so big about that?”
“Of course it’s big,” she said. “It’s something only myself can do. Nobody else can do it for me.”

I remember that her answer silenced me for a while.
It reminded me of the very-private-very-personal-actions.
You know, the actions we do specially for ourselves and influence us firstly and mostly.
Things that nobody else can do for us.
Learning, understanding, experiencing, reading, everything first hand…,
or basically...
the very subjective things,
the opportunities to realize, see everything, and incorporate them profoundly in our souls,
and the only moments when we can truly grow.

Yeah, Cyn was right.
It’s REALLY...

big.

I Will Read Your Mind!

Yes, you got me right.

Through this ordinary blog, I will scan your thoughts and see the depths of your soul.

All you have to do is look closely at the screen and focus.

Don’t try to transfer your mind to me, that’s my job.

Just simply open it, and let me in.

OK, are you ready?

Focus...

Relax...

Breathe...

And let me in...

...

...

Mm.. yes I can definitely see it.

...

Yes, it’s so vivid.

...

...

And STOP!

I’m done.

You want to see what I’ve got?
Here it is.

Language = Insights

I’m just starting to learn German by bits.
I had only known three languages before, Indonesian, English, and Javanese (passive).
So here's what I've got so far.

None of them are alike! (mm... yeah, of course they aren't)

Am I Gay?

So pretty…
Damn sexy…



Since she’s very famous, I figure you already know who she is.

Yep, you’re right.
She’s the popular Nong Poy.

Born a male 23 years ago by the name Saknarin Marnyaporn, she underwent sex reassignment surgery at the age of 17.
By the time she was 19, she had won Miss Tiffany's 2004 and Miss International Queen 2004.
Since then, she has appeared in various television gigs.

Keep in mind that beside the sex reassignment, she did not have any other surgery.
So, her looks is completely natural (of course if you put hormonal therapy into the equation).

Anyway, the hypothetical question is,
“If you were in a post-apocalyptic world where there were only you, a real but dead-skunk-ugly woman, and her, and you could only pick one as your mate, who would you pick?”

Err…

NOSTRA AETATE

A friend of mine once told me why he stayed Catholic. He said that for one, the Church allowed him to freely search for the truth.

He’s got some point.

The Second Ecumenical Council of the Vatican (or popularly known as the Second Vatican Council) passed a declaration on 'the relation of the Church with non-Christian religions' in 1965. It is known as Nostra Aetate (Latin, translated as ‘In Our Age’).

What does it say?

Well, you can decide it for yourself.

Epic Fail Videos

These videos made me want to piss and cry.
Make sure you have your speakers out loud.
Enjoy. :)

You Are What You Love: A Reflection on Dreams

“You are what you love.”

- Donald Kauffman in Adaptation

This is the last time I’ll abuse this quote, and if you still want to read this, you'll have to read the first post first.

In my first post, I describe that you are what you love, and the world plays some part in defining what you love at the very least.

Well, last Sunday I watched this talk show called Kick Andy. There were a couple of guests, all of them accomplished something despite their disabilities.

I’m only going to talk about two of them.

- One man had so small limbs that he couldn’t support himself. He had spent his entire life on a wheelchair without friends. When he had been young, he would have spent all day by himself, listening to the radio. After a lot of hard work and determination, he had his own radio station.

- One woman had been struck by cancer not once, but twice. She had survived both of them. She was a medical doctor, specializing in nuclear medicine.

They are all great fighters, we all know that, and I’m not going to say otherwise.
I just find it interesting that their deepest dreams and desires correlate perfectly with their past emotional wounds.

- The man who was desperate for communications is now the owner of a communications hub – a radio station.

- The woman who was beaten by cancer is now someone who destroys cancers – a nuclear medicine doctor.

It’s amazing how people take the biggest trauma in their lives and make it their purpose to be a 'powerful someone' exactly in that very field, isn't it?
The world DOES shape what we love.

I wonder what trauma I had that gave me this unspecific drive.

You Are What You Love: A Reflection on Relationships

This was meant to be included in the previous post (it’s best if you read it first), but since I felt it was talking about a different thing, I decided to make it a separate post.

Anyway,

“You are what you love.”

- Donald Kauffman in Adaptation

The quote has got me thinking about relationships, and I was finally left with a conclusion.

Your relationship can only work (as in having reached an interpersonal level, and not just basic functional level) if your partner loves what you love.

You Are What You Love: A Reflection on Self

"You are what you love."

- Donald Kauffman in Adaptation

The quote is powerful, isn’t it? I got it from a blog I found the other day. In just five words, it is able to describe how you see (your perspective upon the world), what you value (everything that matters to you), and why you do (your tendencies, drives, actions); the things that are basically and brutally, your true existence, or basically and cautiously, the deeper aspects of YOU.

No Need for That

Sometimes I think the reason I don't put too much effort to comfort myself is because I love myself too much to put myself in any kind of trouble that comes from trying to provide comforts for me.

Confusing?
In other words,
me: I'm gonna find something to make you comfortable.
me: Don't bother. I love you even if you don't.
me: Okay.

Pretty weird, eh?

Not a Criminal

Picture description
- I made this to be used in a poster.
- It's the first time I ever used conte. So now you know why the picture's a f*cking mess.
- When I finished it, and saw that there's nothing I could do to improve it (conte is hard to erase), I found that due to my lack of care, my hands are all black, the floor is black, and even my previous sketches had black stains on them (thank God I've scanned them all).
- Nevertheless, it actually felt good... I don't know why really.
- I'm gonna do better next time.

John the Coward

John the Coward

Picture description
It's basically an illustration for a short story I made. It's in Indonesian, though.

The First Asian Team to Participate in the World Cup

Yep, it's Indonesia!!!

Although at the time, it's still under the name of Dutch East Indies (the year was 1938),

Achmad Nawir - Dutch East Indies Football Team Captain

The Game

The Team

and it also got knocked off on the first game 0-6 by Hungary.
But hey, Hungary was a strong team back then and it eventually became the finalist, so the loss is understandable.

I wonder when we can experience that again.

Female Buddha

This is a sketch I just made.
It's special because it's the first time I draw solely on memory.
(and some guidance from my mother)
Woo hoo!!!

Female Buddha

Picture description
Mm..
It's a female Buddha.

Why did I draw it?
Because I've been thinking about the feminine and the Truth.

That's pretty much it I guess.
If it doesn't look good, try zooming it until it does.
Hehehe...

UPDATE
I made some improvements after Ron's input and also added some details on the neck.

My Name Is Hubertus!

Yes, I have quite an uncommon name in Indonesia.
Somehow, people always have a hard time getting it right, and it gets even worse when I say it on the phone.
I’ve been called Robertus, Albertus, or even Petrus.

The best I’ve got so far is Rubertus.

The worst?
Try changing the first letter to ‘P’.

Yeah.
Great.
Pubertus.

Now who the f*ck in their right mind would name their child ‘Pubertus’?!
It's so disgustingly hormonal!
And It didn’t get any better when the woman on the phone who had kindly blessed me with the name kept repeating it like it’s a normal name or something.

Geez..
Some friends of mine call me Hube.
Does it mean if she ever becomes my friend, I’ll be called Pube?

Leaving Your Sins: A Horrible Sunday Mass Sermon

Luke 9:57-62 (New International Version)

The Cost of Following Jesus

57As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, "I will follow you wherever you go."
58Jesus replied, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head."
59He said to another man, "Follow me."
      But the man replied, "Lord, first let me go and bury my father."
60Jesus said to him, "Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God."
61 Still another said, "I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say good-by to my family."
62Jesus replied, "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God."

In today’s mass the passage was about… well, you can read it yourself. Most sermons I’ve heard about this passage were helplessly chaotic. That’s why I decided to write the sermon I heard today. Guess what? It took on a wholly chaotic way, no different than before or even worse.

The Beauty in Christianity

One fundamental thing in Christianity is the thought of 'God gives Himself to Man'.

A common interpretation involves Jesus, who is 'God giving Himself to Man', sacrificing Himself to erase the sins of Man and buy them back from evil with His blood.

This thought, as expected, becomes the source of joy for most Christians, because it is considered that even though we are flawed beings, God is willing to go through all the trouble to save us.

Unfortunately, this very thought also tragically destroys the value of creations, especially Man as God’s image,

Come to Think of It...

The only cooking show on TV which is able to fill its interlude with clips of the chef swimming around aimlessly.
...
And we have no complaints against it also.

Keep it up! :)

Why Kneeling When Praying?

Karl Rahner, SJ

Yes, it’s a very stupid question.
Most people will just answer, “Does it matter?”

But do you know that the answer of this very question helped Karl Rahner (a respected theologian) explain his solution to one of the hardest problems in theology, the connection between sacraments and grace?

Please Farhat Abbas...

Polisikan Luna Maya, Farhat Abbas Cuek Dihujat
Adhie Ichsan - detikhot

Jakarta Pengacara Farhat Abbas lewat Lembaga yang dipimpinnya, LSM Hajar Indonesia, melaporkan Luna Maya dan Ariel ke polisi atas video mirip mereka yang beredar di internet. Lelaki yang mencalonkan diri sebagai ketua KPK itu pun cuek saja meski dihujat atas tindakannya.

"Kan yang melaporkan atas nama LSM, biar aja kalau ada respon negatif," ucap Farhat saat berbincang dengan detikhot via telepon, Senin (7/6/2010) malam.

Suami dari Nia Daniati itu melapor ke polisi karena mengaku peduli terhadap masa depan generasi muda. Makanya ia tetap melaporkan pelaku serta penyebar video porno yang dirasanya sudah meresahkan masyarakat. Farhat juga tidak peduli jika tindakannya dianggap hanya menumpang tenar.

"Ini bukan tentang numpang tenar, tetapi bentuk kepedulian," tambahnya. Pengacara yang pernah menangani artis Manohara itu juga tidak takut jika sewaktu-waktu dilaporkan balik oleh Luna Maya maupun Ariel.

Sebelumnya, LSM Hajar Indonesia bersama Perhimpunan Mahasiswa Hukum Indonesia (Permahi) melaporkan Luna dan Ariel tentang tindak pidana pornografi dengan pasal 27 ayat 1, UU No. 11 tahun 2008, tentang informasi transaksi elektronik (ITE), junto pasal 282 KUHP. (ich/yla)

Another example that proves education doesn't mean shit here.

- Even though I personally believe the persons in the tape are indeed Luna Maya and Ariel, is it right to report them even though it's still not confirmed that way?
- If it has been confirmed that they are the ones in tape, is it right to punish them? I thought they were the victims? I wonder how Farhat Abbas would react if someone took a picture of him naked in the bathroom, posted it on the net, and had him reported for displaying nudity in public.

Publicity stunt? Overblown self-righteous ego? Morality retardation? Or just plain old raw stupidity?

The Great Scribbles

Everyone who knows me well can tell right away how’s my attitude towards religion. The word ‘careful’ will be the least powerful term to describe my stance; for most of the time I either hate it, or pay no attention to it.

Yeah, I know that for some people religion is:
- the only way to live life
- the only way to salvation
- the only way to God

Well, I used to think the same way.

But then I started to think that religion is NOT the only way, but rather A way among many other ways.

And now, as I get older, I think religion is NOT the way.

Yep.

Religion along with its scriptures is NOT the way at all.

Kalimantan Timur 10

Pictures pictures pictures.
No stories this time.

O My Dear DHF

I just got back from hospital stay. Seven days straight for DHF. Great.
I didn't know it could be a LOT of pain; or bloodier.

Anyway, I planned lots of writings including commentaries before I left. Now, they're just gone. I'm still trying to remember all of them.

So... if the next topics seem like out of date, please bear with me.

A Bit of ASCII Art… and Before Sunrise

Do you know those pictures who are made simply of letters, numbers, or any other keyboard characters? Yep, like the ones you see in program cracks.

It is called ASCII art.
ASCII art is a graphic design technique that consists of pictures pieced together from printable characters; or basically, a text based art.
I just found out about it the other day while browsing for letters.

This is another example of ASCII art. The Yin Yang on the right is actually made of the words ‘yin yang’. You can zoom in to see it.

bX-q0tcxb OR gadget broken

My layout is broken.
I can't add any gadgets.
This really blows.
I'm stuck with this template for a while.
Hope everything gets back to normal soon.

UPDATE
There.
Everything's pretty much back to normal now.
I guess I'll keep this ever-wide template after all.

Jens Lekman's Your Arms Around Me

Jens Lekman is a Swedish indie musician currently residing in Australia. His sound uses a lot of samples, but I find them comforting. Especially the odd lyrics.



This is a song from his second album. It is also used in the movie Whip It.
He is known to change his lyrics every time he sings live, so I use the lyrics taken straightly from the album.

Who the Hell Is Clara Adelin Supit?

About a week ago, Dewi Sartika or Clara Adelin Supit (23), a student in Jakarta, reported to the police about her allegedly nude pictures that spread on the web.

She said the pictures were made at her friend's request.

Misly, the friend, said she needed them to cure her ex-boyfriend who was under a hex.

Dewi reluctantly agreed after making it clear to Misly that she wanted the pictures to be well-kept.

So she was surprised to finally find them on Facebook.

The police have questioned Misly, who accused her ex-boyfriend as the one who put them online.

Jesika Dhanies/© 2006 Richard Kern

The paragraphs above pretty much sum out the popular news filling out most headlines on the net.

It seemed pretty simple, right?

Well, in the next days, twists have come to make the matter worse.

Pageblug, the Deathly Plague

Pageblug is a Javanese term meaning 'deathly plague'.
I use the word 'deathly' instead of 'deadly' because the plague isn't just deadly (capable of producing death), it is deathly (suggestive of death, deaths are certain).
The plague itself means a lot more than a widespread disease, it means affliction.

In 1972, Pageblug descended upon three adjacent areas in Yogyakarta. The areas, Patangpuluhan, Sindurjan, and Bugisan, had a series of numerous deaths. For 6 months, death occurred once a week. The cause varied. Some died of old age, some died of illness, and some died for no apparent reason at all.

The Early Years of Gay, Queer, and Faggot

Just everybody knows what the words gay, queer, and faggot mean these days.

Well, in the early years of their origin, they had a wholly different meaning.
Gay actually meant happily excited; queer simply meant odd, or eccentric; and faggot meant a bundle of sticks, a knitting technique, or a kind of meatball.
Sometimes they're still used like that in literature, but hardly.

It's interesting how paragraphs like these would be seen nowadays.

The lady stopped faggoting her piece of cloth and offered him some faggots.
"I apologize for the food," she said. "My husband is a hunter. This is the only thing I can offer."
Flambeau kindly refused. "What do you do anyway?" he asked.
She looked at him and said with a warm smile, "I gather faggots in the woods and sell them."
She then fell into silence as she continued knitting.
Flambeau watched her work closely. It wasn't done yet, but it had already shown its beauty. He found himself amazed. Everything in his sight was so queer, that he became gay.

A Bit About Anarchism

Symbol of Anarchy

Every time I heard about anarchy or anarchism, the first picture that came to mind was people throwing rocks to the police in some kind of riot. In my ignorance, anarchy and anarchism were something of a retarded-violent-childish mind. So when I read somewhere that the character V from the novel ‘V for Vendetta’ was actually an anarchist, rather than a romantic freedom fighter, it intrigued me. The character was described as educated and civilized. What an educated-civilized person would have to do with anarchy?

I finally decided to look it up (sadly, in Wikipedia for the time), and this is a bit of what I came up.

Doubts in Faith: A Beautiful Sunday Mass Sermon

John 20:24-31 (New International Version)
Jesus Appears to Thomas
 24Now Thomas (called Didymus), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came. 25So the other disciples told him, "We have seen the Lord!"
      But he said to them, "Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe it."
 26A week later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, "Peace be with you!" 27Then he said to Thomas, "Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe."
 28Thomas said to him, "My Lord and my God!"
 29Then Jesus told him, "Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed."
 30Jesus did many other miraculous signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not recorded in this book. 31But these are written that you may[a] believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name.

In today’s mass, the passage was about Thomas. Most sermons I’ve heard about this passage took on Thomas as the antagonist. His doubt was despised and considered a sin. That’s why I decided to write the sermon I heard today. It took on a wholly different take.

Gabor Arkangyal

Gabor Arkangyal

Picture description
Gabor Arkangyal means archangel Gabriel. I don't know much about him other than God favors him the most. He is surprisingly the leader of the favored four, not archangel Michael as a lot of people believed.
A friend of mine knows him a lot more than I do. Maybe he'll write about it sometimes.

The picture is based on a statue of him in the center of Budapest.

"I don't want to talk about God. I'd rather talk about Man."

"God is found by searching something else entirely."

"If you want someone to see an apple, give him oranges and tell them they're not it."

"To understand silence, one should first understand noise."

"Even when I apologize for my ego, I did it for my ego."

"I've come to learn that there is nothing need to be learned."

Old Post: Starry Sky - A New Perspective

I found these old posts from my no-longer-existing-blog when I was cleaning my hard drive. I thought it would be interesting to post them again and add some commentaries.

I love to watch a starry sky. I often consider it as a window of different time options. Maybe just like a time machine display.

Stars are so far away that it took several, tens, hundreds of years for their light to reach earth. The star we see is the star at a moment of the past.
When you see the stars, you may see the light that was generated at the time you were born. Or the time your father was born.
When you see the stars, you may see 1973, 1987, 1964, or whatever years the light originate. You see the stars of those years.
The sky is like a vast beautiful black blue screen filled with images from the past.

I think there is nothing more VIVID in terms of "looking back at the past" than watching the stars.


COMMENT
No comment...

Old Post: Just How Late I Am

I found these old posts from my no-longer-existing-blog when I was cleaning my hard drive. I thought it would be interesting to post them again and add some commentaries.

I've been breathing for 24 years, 9 months, and 22 days.
I've only been living for less than 3 years.
Just how late I am.
Better late than never.

COMMENT
I get the feeling I'll be writing something similar in the next months.

Old Post: I Hate Religious Fanatics!

I found these old posts from my no-longer-existing-blog when I was cleaning my hard drive. I thought it would be interesting to post them again and add some commentaries.

God, I hate religious fanatics! especially those who always put a smile on their faces when they listen or talk to people. I feel like smacking their heads off just to wipe off those smirks. They think they're better than everyone else while their thoughts are super-shallow and stupid. I may not know everything, but at least I don't consider myself better than anyone else. Let alone accepting appraisals like some holy men.

God, I really hate religious fanatics!

COMMENT
I still do.

Old Post: Why I Don't Want to Learn Playing Musical Instruments

I found these old posts from my no-longer-existing-blog when I was cleaning my hard drive. I thought it would be interesting to post them again and add some commentaries.

Playing music has always been interesting for me. I like watching people generate beautiful sounds. But I've never been too keen on learning how to do it.

Because I believe if I did, I would destroy its beauty.

A Woman of My Dreams

She would have to be:

1. kind
   - has a strong sense in moral values
2. smart
   - able to understand things, opinionated, cultured with a wide sense of art
3. deep
   - has a relevant perspective, able to feel beauty in a non-aesthetic way

OR

1. has a physical appearance resembling the next girls.



Brains or balls, gentlemen. Brains or balls.

Cyclopes and Us

Some say that Cyclopes, the one eyed creatures from Greek mythology, are cursed because they know the time of their death.

When I thought about it, I used to ask myself.

Is it a curse, or is it, in fact, liberating?

Then again, I thought about myself, and how I didn't have the slightest clue about my time.

Is it a curse, or is it, in fact, liberating?

I don't know. It may as well be a matter of choice.

Mm.. It's so easy to say it when they're just words.

100th Post

Celebrating the 100th crap I've written so far!!!

I've read somewhere that it's a custom to write 100 things people don't know about you in your 100th post.
I don't think I have 100 things to say.
Even if I did, I wouldn't want to bore anyone.
So here's just one.

1. Hair barely grows on my right armpit.

There it is.
I think that's humiliating enough to cover the other 99, or even other celebrations, so to speak.

Anyway,
happy 100th post everyone! :)
Thanks so much for everything.

Take Me Out Indonesia, a Zoological Perspective

I used to watch Take Me Out Indonesia on Indosiar. Yeah, it’s a guilty pleasure. I loved to see the happy good looking people (and Yuanita Christiani, of course). Although, I must admit that most of the time I thought the people involved were complete morons.

Anyway, the other day I was so fed up with the show. Most of what the contestants were after was a quick marriage without a glimpse of anything profound. No better than animals. The men proudly showed up their houses (or should I say nests?), and the women kept asking if the men already had a house to start breeding as soon as possible.

Bah.

Well, to prove my point, here’s something I quickly made up with a little bit of searching in the notorious Wikipedia.

I rest my case.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall: Hopeful Joy

I've watched this movie five times, and still counting. Not to mention some particular scenes I watched over and over again.

This movie is great.
- Downright funny (subtle, realistic, intelligent comedy which is great + not so subtle, over the top comedy which is also great).
- Great interesting memorable characters and quotations.
- Acting is convincing (adds to the funny). Apatow (the producer) has some of the greatest talents under his wing. I love his movies.
- Plot is great (not quite using the same formula Hollywood has, of course, Jason Segel wrote it), close to life (well sometimes it's not, but even when it doesn't, it gives joy).
- Directing, editing, cinematography (the setting being in Oahu helps) are good.

I'm starting to write some gibberish nonsense, so just watch it. You won't be sorry.

The Great Darn Thing

Three days ago my father had this seminar about marriage in church. He had told me to come because I asked a question earlier, and he was interested to hear the answer. I didn’t go, but that’s not what I’m about to talk about.

This question is.

“Why the hell does the Church have to have anything to do with marriage?”

Ice Cold Bento

Bento was my dog.
The guy was ice cold, just like James Bond. Hehehe...
He’s incredibly loyal though.

Anyway, I’ve got two pictures of him.
This is the first one.

As you can see, he’s got the whole ice-in-my-veins-attitude.
It’s hard to take a picture of his different side.

But wait.
This is what I've got after incorporating some tricks.

He’s better in this picture, don’t you think? He’s almost smiling, very adorable.
Keep in mind that they were all taken with the same camera.

So, I guess the pictures prove the theory “the man behind the gun”.

Mm...

Or actually in this case, “the man-holding-a-fried-chicken behind the gun.”
Hehehe...

Why Superman Can Fly

The son of Krypton is no doubt the most prominent superhero of all time.
One of his special traits is that he is able to fly!
Not many superheroes can do that, especially the earlier ones.

Well, it turns out that he hasn’t been able to fly all the time. There was a moment when all he could do was jumping over buildings. And no, I’m not talking about the time when he hasn’t worn his costume (being the young Clark Kent).  I’m talking about the time he HAS worn it and been called Superman.

In the earliest comics, Superman was not all that powerful. He was only faster than a train, as strong as all you need to lift a car, and he couldn’t fly.
All he did was jumping over distant buildings.
When the comic was going to be made into a cartoon film, his jumping ability proved to be a problem.
There was too much production cost to draw a man jumping over different buildings all the time.
So, naturally…
He was made able to fly.

Regardless of the actual reason, I still love the idea that he can fly. It would be un-cool to see a man with a large piece of cloth on his back jumping around mercilessly.

The End of What??

2012 EQUALS the end of the world.

Everybody knows that.

So it’s not strange to overhear a conversation about it in a bus on my way home.
It was between two working women.
The conversation went like this (it’s in Indonesian).

1: “Lo serem gak nanti 2012?”

2: “Iya. Katanya bakal kiamat ya? Emang gara-gara apa sih?”

1: “Gak tau ya. Gue denger sih gara-gara radiasi matahari naik besar-besaran. Jadinya semua kena. Cuaca bakal gak jelas, banyak bencana, penyakit aneh-aneh, banyak orang yang mati, sampe komunikasi aja, internet, HP gitu semua bakal mati.”

2: “Hah! Jadi gak bisa facebook-an lagi dong?!!”

1: …

Mm…

There’s something terribly wrong about this.

A Student of Everything

Do you know the kind of people who say, “I study all religions”, sometimes with a cocky smile on their face?

I used to hate that kind of people.

The DANGEROUS Group

Can you guess what group it is?
It has the following characteristics:

Times When God Hits Too Hard

I think God hits us in our lives every once in a while.
And I know, His hits can be very painful.
The pain they create helps us to flourish, though.

By holding against it, we become stronger.
By localizing it, we know what part of us still needs corrections.
By acknowledging it, we’re in our way of becoming mystic.

Jesus is one great example of a mostly successful story about pain.
He endured lots of it, and hardly lost His grip.
It makes you wonder what enabled Him to do so.
Was it faith, hope, or a unique way of seeing the world?

But anyway, this post is not about Jesus.
This post is not even about a success story.
Quite the contrary, this post is about those who failed badly.

Stieg Larsson’s The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo: A Thriller Perfection

I very rarely say the word 'perfection', but I have never read anything like this book before.
It’s by far the best thriller and one of the best books I’ve ever read.

Pigs of the Future

Two days ago, a friend of mine told me about another friend of mine who just did her mandatory service in Papua (a mostly untouched region).
She told him about how the natives there valued their pigs highly.
They cared for them, nurtured them, and even sometimes breastfed the piglets, so it’s not strange to have a tribal war because of the pigs.

She then commented about how she thought of it all as primitive, the idea of valuing pigs, and thought that it had to be left behind.
Upon hearing this, my friend gave his disapproval.
His disapproval would have been the same as mine, had I heard the story.

Edward’s Special Lines

Beautiful people have more privileges than the un-beautiful ones.

One is that they get to say the ‘special’ lines.

What are they? What makes them so special?

Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight: So Dull, It’s Suspicious

I’ve finally finished Twilight after quite a while.
I have even watched the movie!
So I guess it’s safe for me to say my opinion.

I don’t like the book or the movie, but the movie was better.

A Helping Condom

Free Sex!

(Pre-marital sex included)

Some people want it.
Some people don’t want to have anything to do with it.

The dispute is ages long.

And it also happens here, in Indonesia.

However, not so long ago, right in the middle of the dispute, another issue came out.

The Stages of Religion and Being Religious

I divide religion and being religious into two stages:

Conceptual ------------ Beyond Conceptual

Furthermore, I divide the conceptual stage into two more stages, Early and Late, changing the description above to become:

Early Conceptual --- Late Conceptual ------------ Beyond Conceptual

Now, how do they differ from each other?
I have made a table to answer that.

I Love You, But...

I stumbled upon this when I checked out a video in my friend's blog.
All I've got to say is that this kid is on to something. :))

Glasvegas' Flowers and Football Tops: The Murder of Kriss Donald

About a week ago, I caught a music video, Flowers and Football Tops by the Scottish band Glasvegas. It was one of the best I've ever seen. The mood was all gloomy, gray, haunting even, but it still has a feeling of beauty in it.

Little did I know, the song had a very dark background behind it.
It is based on the murder of Kriss Donald.

Why Humans Are Destined for Greatness

I wanted to write it with my own words, just like a friend of mine suggested.

But I'm just too lazy.

Besides, an old book by Dr. Nico Syukur Dister OFM. that belongs to my father says it quite nicely already.
It's in bahasa though.

Not Just Any Bond Girl

Feeling aroused already?
Wait till you hear the whole story.

This is Caroline Cossey.
She played in 007's For Your Eyes Only.

The real gig is that,
she wasn't born a girl.
She was a boy the first 20 years of her life.

So it's remarkable she got a part in a Bond movie.

But that's not the only thing she's done.
She also managed to attain numerous modeling achievements, including a pose for Playboy in 1991.
Wow.
She is now married and live near Atlanta.

PS: She only appeared briefly for the Bond movie, and did not have any sexual scenes with at-the-time-Bond-Roger-Moore. It would be such a scandal though.

Semen Battle Royale

No, it’s not some gay porn title.
If you look below, you’ll actually see that this post is labeled culture.
This post is about how to settle scores.

As a teenager, I loved Egyptian mythologies, especially the battles between two gods, Horus and Set.
They fought because Horus wanted to claim control over all Egypt...
And also because Set killed Horus’ father and fed his penis to the fish (wow, talk about repressed anger).
Eventually, through brawl and wit, Horus finally won against the evil Set and rule Egypt.

It was a nice story,
until I found just exactly how he won.

Just for Me: A Reminder

I refuse to become the thing I hate the most.

I refuse to deliberately hurt people with my own uncertainty.

I refuse to become a monster.

To those of you who know what I mean,
I am truly sorry.

Aw… The Irony (a note about Gus Dur and St. Albertus church)

Gus Dur’s death on December 30th 2009 raised much of public appraisal frenzy. Everyone just went on and on about how he had been such a devoted pluralist, naming him The Father of Pluralism, and even went as far as campaigning him for national hero and December 30th for pluralism day.

All of this people-suddenly-get-interested-in-pluralism never seized to amaze me.

WOW.

I didn’t know you all considered pluralism to be a good thing.
I didn’t know you loved pluralism so much.
Hell, I thought you condemned it, thinking it as a bane in a utopia society you’ve always dreamed of.

Besides, a church in Bekasi was burned down on December 15th and you just forgot about it, right?
It's just not worthy enough to address, right?
So I guess it’s “let us all devote ourselves to pluralism but neglect burning down a church an issue”, right?

And to have it just for wacky reasons such as "the statue of Mary was so big, the taste of Christianity was considered too much to handle" is just overwhelming...
It's a church! What did you expect to be inside, a big statue of SpongeBob?
Surely, you can't keep silent about this!!

Pluralism my ass, please stop desecrating the memory of God-bless-him-renaissance-man-Gus-Dur with your mumbo jumbo.
Besides, he wouldn't be a hero if you all loved pluralism just as he did.