Thursday, September 10, 2009

Just for Me: a Revelation

If the baker thinks the bread is shit,
then it certainly is.
So why do you bother eating it?
Just dump it.
It's shit!
O dear Lord...
It's shit!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Not Much for a Copycat

I am not a bad forger. I can copy signatures quite well; especially when I’m most relaxed.
It’s proven to be useful several times for me and my friends, in college and after.

So it’s bewildering for me to suck at it in when it mattered the most; especially when the signature I had to do was my OWN.

I got my passport today, and there were two things that needed to be signed.
One was a form, and the other one was the passport itself.

I decided to sign the form first.

Guess what happened? I choked in the middle.
I couldn’t remember how to finish my own signature.
Damn.
So I just held my breath and wrote the last half quickly, hoping that it would remind me.

But it didn’t.

There written on my form, a signature I didn’t even recognize.

It couldn’t be changed. So I went on to the passport.

I took a deep breath this time, trying to relax. It was my last chance to do right.
Then with a strong and confident stroke, I signed the passport.
The result was a beautiful signature, strong, and clear…
And it looked just like the one I had in my form…

What the hell? I said to myself.
I’ve heard about people making mistakes in signing their names, but I’ve never heard about someone making two perfectly identical errors.

On one hand, or should I say the good side, it’s convincing; since I’ve got two identical signatures.
But, why the hell would I need to be convincing? It’s my own signature!
I don’t know.
I don’t have to change my signature to resemble them from now on right?

Monday, September 7, 2009

Profile: Antareja, the Deadliest

Antareja
Antareja was the son of Bima (second brother of Pandawa) and Nagagini (daughter of the snake god).

Being the grandson of the snake god, Antareja was born with scales all over his body that rendered him immune to all weapons. He couldn’t be killed as long as he touched the ground. He could also revive the dead, defying the person’s decided fate.

His most popular and deadliest ability, however, came from his tongue. He was so venomous that he could kill someone just by licking his/her footstep, without ever had to make direct contact with the person’s body at all.

He was truthful, reserved, loyal, willing to sacrifice himself, and devoted to the Gods.

But all of those noble characteristics were not enough.

Kresna, a reincarnation of the God Wisnu, thought that his existence could tip the frail balance between Pandawa (good) and Kurawa (evil). His participation in Bharatayuda would have meant a quick end to the war, depriving it from its glory, original purpose, and destroyed the fragile storylines for every character which had been meticulously woven by the Gods.

His doom was a must before Bharatayuda could start.

So Kresna came to him and had him killed by telling him to lick his own footstep.

Antareja was dead simply because he was too powerful.
But it ensured Bharatayuda and all the glory that came with it.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

A Fallen (for) Angel

Last night I phoned my best friend.
At one time the talk was about my love history.
In general it’s quite normal, except for that one time with a girl named Angel.
I never knew her actually. I just found out her Friendster page on the internet and decided to message her.

Well, maybe I won’t disclose everything in detail about it; but, let me just put it like this.
My pursuing her through Friendster messages has left me with these facts.
  • One message makes you a normal person.
  • Three messages make you a little misguided.
  • Six messages make you a complete loser.
  • Nine messages make you a borderline criminal.

  • And anything involving coming around several times to her work place just to see her without even saying hello definitely makes you a stalker; regardless of how many messages you send; and especially if you send a lot.

My best friend just loves to bring that up. And it’s actually pretty funny once you’ve got through it.

Anyway, I heard that she’s single again, so my best friend suggested that I go after her once more.
“You’ve got nothing to lose anyway,” she said. “You’re at the bottom of the pit. There’s no way she can hate you more than she already has.”
“Maybe,” I said. “But haven’t you heard about jail?”
“O yeah,” she replied. “I didn’t think of that.”
She paused a bit.
“But one message wouldn’t hurt,” she finally said.

Hm…

PS: I swear to you this is not how I usually behave.

The Root of It All

It has come to my mind that the root of most my problems, if not all, is my insecurity.

I’m an insecure arrogant bastard.

How about that?

I feel I am better than anyone else but at the same time not sure about myself.

Such view has rendered myself to act only in two ways when I feel attacked.
  • If I consider the person who’s talking bad about me is better, I will submit myself to a dark gloomy state of self loathing and feeling sorry for myself for not being any better.
  • If I consider him/her to be nothing better or even worse, I will lash out in anger to be taken lightly by a person I think is a total loser.
The art of giving me enough love and appreciation in order to free it from the need to get them from others is a lesson I still yet to learn.

Just hang for it, OK.

UPDATE
(please note that I just got back from Sunday mass, so I wrote this in a state of peace and serenity)
All of the above is worsen by the fact that I have no patience or tolerance for idiots who can’t see what they are, thus are acting smart while in fact everything they’ve ever said or thought is plainly steaming crap.

Stupid, Just Stupid

I have my own stand on religion thank you very much.
So a stupid question like this makes me wonder about Man’s supposedly better brain.

“Why do you always question your religion?”

I am very sorry, but truth be said, it would be very difficult to find a dumber question than that; especially when it is followed with a just-as-stupid remark.

“Just accept it! I do. That is why it is called FAITH.”

God! Sometimes I don't believe You made Man by your image!
No wonder we still hurt each other for the sake of our fucked fucking religions.

First of all, I believe that FAITH is a response from Man to God’s touch.
And since I appreciate God so much, I try to respond with everything I’ve got.
And that includes this beautiful brain of mine.
I can’t just wear a particular outfit or eat something because the supposedly holy book says so.
No!
I have a God-given ratio. I have the wonderful ability to think.
And if I want to find the TRUE God, I will use it in my favor.

“But, Man can’t reach God through logic or ratio or thoughts.”

Yes, I agree with that.
I’m mostly agnostic remember?!!
Maybe I can’t use my so called logic or ratio or thoughts alone to reach God.
Maybe I still need that leap of faith.
But surely as hell (pun intended), I can use it to DISCARD all the idiotic things therein religion.

My brain gives me recognition of what lasts and what doesn’t.
It gives me the ability to differ what really matters and what doesn’t.
Using it, I can see what’s important and relevant; and what’s not.

Clothes, food, postural position, or anything dumb and only come from some traditional cultural heritage is not going to get any-fucking-one to God.
NO IT WON’T!
Awareness does, Love does, Humanity does; but not those stupid ways.
I can’t see how wearing a piece of cloth is MORALLY better.
I can’t see how eating some kind of food has any MORAL values.
I can’t see how arranged postures in prayer are in any way KIND!

They have no MORAL values!
You can’t say those actions are kind, can you?
It’s like saying that my dog is kind because he’s got brown fur. WTF??
It's plainly moronic to consider doing such actions makes you a good person!

Have you seen anyone poor get fed or anyone sad got comforted by it? Let alone will it take you to a higher conscious self of yours!

Stop being stuck with it you stupid people! Wake up and be free! Stop hurting each other for things so vaguely unimportant. I wouldn’t kill anyone who says my dog is light brown because I think he is dark brown, would I?

Wake up and see the real world, Stupid!